It’s come to my attention that there are some misconceptions floating around, specifically in regards to my wife, our relationship, and my transition. Tl;dr? She’s amazing and understanding, supports whatever decision I make, and will continue to be so and do so whatever that decision is.
I’ve tried in vain thumbing through my archives the last couple days to find an essay I wrote for a writing class 14 years ago. It chronicled over half a dozen distinct moments when I’d questioned or confirmed my gender and/or sexuality. I read it out loud to my classmates, who were super accepting (Santa Cruz does get some things right). For the record, coming out shows up on privilege checklists – cishets never face coming out at all; I’ve done it a couple dozen times.
Hi everyone. I’m a transgender woman.
This is not a surprise to most people who’ve known me 8+ years. I was much more open about it then. I think I’m going to frame this post like a question/answer. Which may be awkward, so I’ll drop any TMI stuff at the end, with a warning. Some of these questions are things you should never ask a trans person, unless they volunteer the information. Basically, think of it this way. If you have a question in mind, and you would think it tremendously rude to ask of a cisgender person, don’t ask it of a trans person. Continue reading